Holiday theft is a serious problem.
My friend said she even heard the local TV news addressing the issue only few days ago: women's purses are being snatched and stolen at an alarming rate. It seems to escalate days before a major holiday: Christmas, Thanksgiving, Halloween.... 4th of July.
Imagine this scenario:
The girl liked to work out at her local gym. Reputable venue, safe location, rarely any trouble involving police. It's her 'leg' day so works the machines and goes back to the locker room. She opens her locker, checks the phone for messages, puts it back in her purse, closes the locker, puts the padlock back on and makes sure to lock it with a key. Next, she puts the key into a little pocket in her pants and goes back out to do just a little bit of cardio.
Twenty minutes later she gets back to the locker room and the padlock is gone. An alarm begins to ring in her head. She flips open the door, checks the purse.... her phone is gone. Her wallet is gone. Her bunch of keys that she hung on a hook is gone.... Blood rushed to her head, heart starts pumping faster in realization what just happened. She runs to the front desk and catching her breath she announces "I was robbed!"
This could happen to anyone.
It has happened to me. That girl was me.
Was I at fault? Have I done anything to entice the thief to single me out as an easy target? Hardly. I'm not the type that goes to workout with my purse on the treadmill in front of me, or clutching it frantically under my sweaty arm. I am, however the person who always pays attention that everything is locked and secure before I leave the place.
The truth is, it could have been anyone. Or anywhere. It could have been a woman fueling her car having her purse snatched from her. It could have been someone paying for groceries at the register. Do not ever think it could not happen to you. Do not ever think you're immune to theft because you keep everything under the lock and key. They key can be broken. Mine was.
Such an experience is traumatic, to say the least. I felt singled out and violated. I couldn't understand the "why" and the "how" and I had a tornado in my head. And people will not understand how you feel, unless they have gone through similar experience themselves. You will get a lot of "I'm so sorrys", and while a minute later they'll go back to discussing the latest news or game, you'll feel left all alone to deal with your emotions.
While it's not easy to deal with theft or any traumatic situation, please remember that it's ok to feel all that. And that you will go through certain stages as the days go by. Knowing why you feel and act certain way will help you understand how your body reacts to the shock and will help you deal with it better. And, in turn, will help you to survive the difficult time with your head above the water.
1. The Shock
At first you will be in shock whether you realize it or not. Most likely your brain will feel like it's closed up and you can't think clearly or think at all. If the police or somebody else asks you simple information, you may realize you don't remember anything. If that's the case, don't freak out, you did not forget anything. It will all come back to you. Your body is simply reacting to the shock. And it's ok to have a cry and let your body shake or shiver to get the nerves out. Talking it out to a friend or family member and taking some calming supplements like GABA (quiets the brain) or Holy Basil (quiets the body) will help a lot.
2. The Stress
Depending of what was stolen, you will most like have to replace it one way or another. And that will probably involve extra phone calls, missed time at work and spending extra money trying to recover your posessions. You may have to notify the police and fill out a report, change your house/car keys, lock your bank and credit cards, report fraudulent charges, spent time at DMV getting new Driver's License, or even report possible Identity Theft. It will be stressful, but in order to protect yourself you will have to go through that stage. Take it easy and do one thing at a time. Those things simply have to get done. For a step by step list of what to do and who to contact when your purse gets stolen click HERE.
3. The Acceptance
No matter how angry you'll be at what happened and at the thief you will eventually have to accept the situation and say to yourself "Ok, this happened and I just have to deal with it". This will help you handle the situation better and in more mature way. Tell yourself "This is only temporary, this too shall pass." Say it out loud and believe it.
4. The Positive
Finally, allow yourself to see the good in the bad. It may be difficult at first. Practicing positive attitude of gratitude will help you get out of the situation like a hero, and not like a victim. In my situation I had to get a new phone, and I was offered an upgraded version with higher memory for the same price as the old one. True, I had to start paying this phone off (I only just now paid off the stolen one and couldn't wait for my bill to go down next month), but my phone carrier managed to keep my bill the same it was before, and not higher.
So what can we do to make sure this doesn't happen? How to prevent it? Here are some ideas that I wish I have done differently, and ideas from other, a lot wiser people than myself.
-Do not carry important documents in your purse or wallet. Unless you actually need them that day, do leave Social Security, Medical Cards or most Credit Cards at home. I wish I had done that.
-Do not carry big chunk of cash with you, ever. And if you do have some cash with you, hide it in your purse's pocket; if the thief goes for your wallet only, you'll still have the cash.
-Be alert of your surroundings and do not be distracted. Thieves are looking for people with their head phones on, with a lot of shopping bags, or someone distracted with their phone.
-Keep your purse with you at all times. Do not hang it on the hook in the bathroom. Do not set in down in the shopping cart or at the register. Be always aware where it is, and hold it close to your body.
-If your purse's strap is long, wear it across your shoulders, not on just one shoulder.
-Do not hang your purse on the back of the chair at a restaurant. It's so easy for the thief to reach in and grab the content, even if they do not take the purse. Have it on the table or your lap at all times. Do not put it on the floor either.
-Be watchful where you park your car; avoid shaded, lonely, and secluded spots. Double make sure all doors are locked and your shopping bags are in the trunk or not visible through the windows. Do not leave windows open, preferably not even a crack.
-Never fumble with your pockets or purse looking for keys by your car. Have your keys ready ahead of time.
-Never keep your wallet in your pocket!
-And finally, having learned that the very hard way, never leave your valuables in public places under just a lock because locks can be broken. Keep the items with you. At the gym, from now on I'll be having the gym bag next to me at every machine keeping a close watch on it.
I sincerely hope this helps. Please remember the prevention ideas, and share it with friends. One can never be too careful. Thieves look like ordinary people, it's impossible to point them out in a crowd. Please be careful this and any other holiday!
Thus said, I wish you all a very happy and SAFE 4th of July!!!